Thursday, April 29, 2010

Random Letters

Dear Adam,

I really liked you when you were on American Idol. I was unhappy when you wound up runner-up but was sure that you would eventually do better than Kris because you were FIERCE dammit.

Your album cover had me wondering if some restraint could've been exercised when it came to creative control. Ditto your preponderance towards screeching, and your apparent ambition to channel Queen Elvis.

I'm still not over your costume choice when you were in Sydney for Mardi Gras either. I didn't even know codpieces came those sizes; were you trying to be seen from outer space, by Ziggy Stardust perhaps? I hate to break it to you, but Ziggy don't play that way no more.

Also, you might want to go easy on the carbs.

Careful, you're gonna have someone's eye (or other body parts) out!

The only cause that allows me to hope for better things in your future is how nice you look when you stop overdosing on eyeliner and styling products (but I won't say anything about the pancake base, okay?).

See (if this really is you, then carry on)?

In fact, you and that nice Johnny Weir would make such a cute couple. I can't imagine why anyone hasn't slashed the two of you already. You'd have such catty (but cute!) fights over whose turn is it to wear the (leather) pants.

Always yours,

Auntie Kaypoh.

Saturday, April 24, 2010

I May Be Gone For a While

Dear world,

I'm sorry if we haven't been in touch, but I've been watching Lady Gaga's Telephone video at every chance I have lately. I refer, of course, to the full-length explicit version that runs for nearly 10 minutes and is (still) available on her site, so you don't have to visit YourT00b to whet your curiosity.

I think I could watch it a hundred times and still find something new, because there just seems to be that much going on in it. That's to say nothing of the blatant product placement that just seems to work because the whole thing's a live-action cartoon, albeit a nasty one.

Everyone knows about the use of Tiberium, but there's also the Michael Jackson tribute as well as the reference to an earlier video (Paparazzi) in the form of the Mickey Mouse sunglasses. I'm sure there's an entire shipload of references I missed because I'm not from New York/USA/wherever Jonas Akerlund is from (SWEDISH DEATH METAL BAND).

On another occasion, she looks uncannily like Mara, the leader of the creepy alien children in Village of The Damned, when she puts on her pokerface in well, Pokerface.

Then, there's that sexy take on Gandalf in Love Game (that might just be me though). And, dancing with a bunch of parkour-esque-istos like Madonna? Really? Not to mention writhing around dressed in only rhinestones and body paint ala a certain Ms Spears at a point in her life when she was hot. Did she really wanna take a ride on a disco stick that badly?

Don't even get me started on Bad Romance, which is Pan's Labyrinth + James Bond but gone all sorts of wrong.

And there you have it, almost half of her entire discography and enough pop culture references for an entire thesis. Either she is very clever or considers videos of yore her very own bag of pick-n-mix.

I like watching her gyrate but her face confuses me because she looks like Marilyn Manson. Come to think of it, Mr. Warner has been very quiet after the release of Eat Me, Drink Me, hasn't he? He's clearly moving in a different direction, and I must say that fetish lingerie suits him.

On the other hand, we shouldn't be surprised at all, given the way he dressed in the band's earlier days. It should be noted though, that his mastery of walking elegantly in ultra-high heels is commendable and impressive, although not wholly surprising.

In the meantime, I remain thus occupied, trying to get Bad Romance to load. Didn't you hear, it's the most-viewed vid on YouTube now.

And, because that was really long (it's been ages since the last post), here is a comic I just don't get.

p.s. - You know what one of the cutest things about Date Night is? The fact that the entire adventure kicks off on a Friday evening and is resolved at the end of the night, allowing them to spend the weekend relaxing and reconnecting. Genius.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Something Something

 An incongruous sense of serenity overcame me when I listened in on my neighbour blasting Hujan (or someone who sounds like them) in the still, breathless vacuum that preceded an awesome thunderstorm.

Only, it didn't rain all that hard in the end. Or at all.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Your Chance To Be A Superstar!

I picked a great day to read The Malay Mail on Tuesday. Fly halfway across the country at my own expense and pay a "processing fee" for a job I may or may not get? Sure!

 (click for bigger version)